I’ve got an office tip for you young folk who have been out of college for a few years and have moved up a few steps in the company. No, this is not about the program “The Office” on NBC (Tuesday night). But wait . . . . maybe it does sort-of relate. That show is delightfully off-beat but mostly genuine, even if bossman Michael Scott is a bit “over the top”. (Bosses are usually jerks, but it’s hard to find one that jerky and yet that harmless; bosses usually have a streak of evil genius that gets them promoted to the job, in spite of their jerkiness.)

There definitely are lots of guys like assistant-boss Dwight Schrute out there, although puff-balls like Dwight usually don’t possess the frustrated mean streak that NBC writes into his character. NBC keeps a blog for Dwight on its web site, called “Schrute Space”. I read it the other day, and it actually made a good point about robots. Dwight, being kind of a techno-geek, said in his blog that robots are often depicted in science fiction as evil, menacing things — but guess what? Robots are all around us right now, and no one seems to be running from them in fear. The fictional Mr. Schrute points out in his blog that if you have a Mr. Coffee in your kitchen, you have a robot there. So wake up and smell the robotic coffee.

Oh, back to my own office tip . . . . which might be the subject for a future episode of The Office (you never know). Once you’ve been with a company for a couple of years, they start taking you a little more seriously. That means that sooner or later you’re going to be called into some kind of important meeting with some kind of high level boss. You know, the ones with the big offices and the nice carpeting and furniture. When that happens, just remember this: stay cool and don’t say anything unless you are asked to speak (unless it’s your third or fourth big meeting and you know something vitally important and relevant to the discussion — and even then, make it fast).

And most important, always listen for that point where the conversation slows down, which means that the main meeting is winding up. At that point, grab your pen and pad and sit forward in your chair, ready to bolt for the door. Usually the big boss will look at you at that point and graciously say “thank you” – that’s your cue to leave. Big bosses are usually quite gracious. You should then graciously smile back and walk briskly back to your cubicle. Everyone else, including your own immediate boss (who you came in with) will remain seated for the after-glow discussion about the heavy crap. That’s the kind of stuff that goes on above your level. If you haven’t already left, i.e. if you think you’re just as important as everyone else at that table, it will get awkward — they will tell you to leave, and you will then lose points.

But if you know just when to leave, you gain points. Big bosses and little bosses love it when the minions know just how important they are. And even though it’s all b.s., you don’t want to hang with that crowd anyway. You want to get back with your fellow minions. So play the stupid status game with them, and keep collecting the paycheck. And then go home (or better yet, go out to a bar with your friends) and watch The Office, and laugh about it all. Until they can finally make a Dwight-like, quasi-intelligent robot to take your place, you can laugh all the way to the bank.